He has done everything well

"He has done everything well" - Mark 7.37

"The days that were heavy for us, that tormented us and made us anxious, days that left us with a trace of bitterness, are the very days that we do not want to leave behind us today, before we also confess about them, thankfully and humbly: 'He has done everything well.'..... We are not supposed to solve the unsolved puzzle of the past and fall into torturous brooding, but to let even the incomprehensible stand and return it peacefully to God's hand.... But the most terrible thorn still remains... The evil fruit of my sin keeps working without end. How can i bring it to an end? And yet you are no Christian - rather, you have become hardened in your sin - if you cannot also say about your guilt: 'He has done everything well!' One thing it does not say is 'We have done everything well.' - Deitrich Bonhoeffer

I know i frequently quote Bonhoeffer, but i like his writings, and this passage particularly spoke to me today. This year has been a strange year for me - a peculiar mix of pretty unpleasant and completely amazing. But one thing is for sure, there is no way that i can say that I have done everything well - far from it - i am truly ashamed of my attitude and behaviour. But i want to take the opportunity to acknowledge that i believe it is still true that HE has done EVERYTHING well - even those things that appear to make no sense to me. So i will be thankful, for the amazing things He has done this year, but also for the parts of this year that, if i'm honest, i would have preferred not to happen. I will be thankful because i trust that He sees the end from the beginning, and understands all things, and works all things for good, because He is faithful and true and richly beautiful. 

I don't know why, but for some reason i don't really feel like making that big a deal about the start of this new year - maybe because i know in reality the start of a new year makes little difference to our lives - it's almost like we set ourselves up for disappointment, by coming up with new aims and new plans etc - or maybe it's just because i'm acutely aware that i have to work out what to do with my life in the new year, and that kinda scares me, though i know it should be an exciting prospect too - either way, i do want to be thankful for this new year in as much as i am thankful for each new day we are given... there is no reason why we should wake up each day, why we should be given another day to live... and so i am thankful for that... for each year, each day, each hour, each minute, each second... because i have no power to keep my heart beating, or my lungs breathing, or my mind working, or my soul existing... that life comes from God alone. 

"Here dies another day, during which i have had eyes, ears, hands and the great world round me. And with tomorrow begins another. Why am i allowed two?" - Chesterton

A person

"We have systems here to explain everything - except how to live. And we have categories for every person on earth, but who can explain just one person?" - Robert Coles

"There is no one who perplexes Jesus. No thought or action is unintelligible to Him. He knows it's origin and end. The most convoluted psychotic and the most abstruse genius are open and laid bare to His understanding. He understands every motion of every mind." - J.Piper

I was just looking through a collection of quotes i've made note of over time, and i noticed how well these two go together. I am grateful that Jesus understands every detail of every person.

By it's cover..

Photos by Sophie

Apparently you should never judge a book by it's cover.... but truthfully, i'm much more tempted to read a book if i like the cover... Just the look of this bookshelf makes me want to read those books. 

A child

"At this point everything becomes clear or unclear, bright or dark. For here we are standing at the centre. And however high and mysterious and difficult everything we want to know might seem to us, yet we may also say that this is just where everything becomes quite simple, quite straightforward, quite childlike. Right here in this centre, in which as a Professor of Systematic Theology i must call to you, 'Look! This is the point now! Either knowledge, or the greatest folly!' - here i am in front of you, like a teacher in Sunday school facing his kiddies, who has something to say which a mere four-year-old can really understand. 'The world was lost, but Christ was born, rejoice, O Christendom!'... 'God became man for thy good, O man. Tis God's own child that binds Himself to thine own blood.'" - Karl Barth (via Wesley Hill)

How vast beyond all measure

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He would give His only Son 

To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss

The Father turns His face away

As wounds which mar the chosen One

Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon a cross

My sin upon His shoulders

Ashamed i hear my mocking voice

Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that held Him there

Until it was accomplished

His dying breath has brought me life

I know that IT IS FINISHED

I will not boast in anything

No gifts, no power, no wisdom

But i will boast in Jesus Christ

His death and resurrection

Why should i gain from His reward?

I can not give an answer

But this i know with all my heart

His wounds have paid my ransom.

- I like this song, by Stuart Townsend, i've had the lyrics stuck on my bedroom wall for 6 years. -

............

Thank you if you have read my blog at all, or commented.... I think i might take a break for a bit and will probably change my settings to private whilst i do. I'm not certain if i will yet, i guess my point is just that if you suddenly can't access this, it's not that i'm being rude, it's just that i've decided to have a break....

*

Photo via Suzy Wire

Stars

"He determines the number of the stars and calls them each by name." - Psalm 147.4

When you really think about it, this is actually pretty amazing... i mean, there are tons of stars... but this verse says God still decides exactly how many there will be and calls them each by name. Does He really name all the stars? I love this God, who seems to so delight in every detail of His creation and overlooks nothing.. I mean, giving all the stars names is kinda what you imagine a kid doing when they joyfully create a painting for their Mum! 

White ribbon Day

"How can it be that God is love? / When blood rolls down upon our land / And Father's lose their only son / Where is the hope? / Oh God we pray for white ribbon day. / How can it be that You could love? / When blood ran down that wooden cross / Your Father gave His only Son / You came for peace / You came to die for white ribbon day / And we pray for peace / To flood our hearts again / Only God can save our nation now / And we long for joy to fill our streets again / Only God can save our nation now / How can it be that God is just? / When flesh is torn, from young and old / And children run in bloody fields / Where is the hope? / Oh God we cry for white ribbon day / And can it be that You are just / When flesh was torn for young and old? / And here we stand saved by Your blood / We'll stand with courage / We'll live and die for white ribbon day / Hallelujah, Hallelujah / Hallelujah, for white ribbon day." - Lyrics by Martin Smith

White

(photo via ilovelittlespoon)

The swing of a sword

"Let me say something about that word: miracle. For too long it's been used to characterize things or events that, though pleasant, are entirely normal. Peeping chicks at Easter time, spring generally, a clear sunrise after an overcast week - a miracle, people say, as if they've been educated from greeting cards. I'm sorry, but nope. Such things are worth our notice every day of the week, but to call them miracles evaporates the strength of the word. Real miracles bother people, like strange sudden pains unknown to medical literature. It's true: they rebut every rule all we good citizens take comfort in. Lazarus obeying orders and climbing up out of the grave - now there's a miracle, and you can bet it upset a lot of folks who were standing around at the time. When a person dies, the earth is generally unwilling to cough him back up. A miracle contradicts the will of the earth...... People fear miracles because they fear being changed - though ignoring them will change you also..... Let me say that a miracle is no cute thing but more like the swing of a sword. " 

- Leif Enger, taken from his novel 'Peace like a River' 

(i love this book).

Sorry

Sorry, my posts can be a little heavy (and strange) sometimes....

Dragon Scales

She walked right in til water swept, past her waist and past her face... 'oh to be clean, to be clean', a wailed groan slipped from her lips.... but blackness stains, she couldn't change. He tried to scratch his dragon scales, with fervent nails he clawed his wings, but underneath was just raw skin.... 'oh to be a child again'..... but shedding scales won't change your name. There is one way, one way alone; It is red blood that turns men white. And Kingly wounds that paid the price. It is His death that rewrites lives.

And so it is: We too must die before we live. We die in Him, and then a whore can become clean, a dragon-man a child again, a heart of stone gets turned to flesh. And now, one thing is left: We go back out into the World, where hearts are hard and souls are black. Where backs are scarred and we get stabbed. If we don't go, how will they know? That girl will drown in her attempts, the dragon-man will bleed to death. His word to us should be enough: we do not go alone.

(photo by Krystian Kujda)

...run and not be weary...

"..they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like Eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:31

Absolutely nothing.

Stare at sorrow for long enough and you will see that there is nothing in it that can bring joy. Absolutely nothing. And when faced with darkness, you realise there is nothing in this that can make light. By it's very definition it is devoid of light and incapable of being anything other than dark. And there is nothing in death that can create life. Absolutely nothing at all. They are complete opposites and in our natural World it is fully impossible for one to turn itself into the other.

But in this devastating reality, there is something so precious to comprehend: Things can still change, but it takes a power outside itself. It takes a miracle. A work of grace. And there is NOTHING that we can boast about. Nothing at all. And here is the most beautiful part of this reality: It means there is hope for every situation. If there is absolutely NOTHING in a situation that can bring about that change, then however bad, however hopeless, however dark something is, it can always be transformed into something beautiful, by the One who is beautiful, by the One who holds the keys of life. In fact, someone who is utterly wretched or in a complete deadlock situation, with no apparent way out, has as much hope of change as a person who seems to have a wealth of gifts and skills to help them change... and actually, in a strange way, the person who is so utterly lost can even have more hope, because they can only rely on a greater power and will have given up trusting in themselves at all. I remember reading something once about leprosy... in Leviticus 13:13 it says that "if the leprous disease has covered all his body, he shall pronounce him clean of the disease..." And so it is with us, when we realise the full extent of our corruption and reach the absolute end of ourselves, we can be pronounced clean, because of Jesus... At the point of utter desperation, there is also the hope of miraculous transformation. 

Every miracle of the past is down to Him... every miracle of the present is down to Him... and every miracle of the future will be down to Him too. For this reason, we can always have hope. No matter what.

 

O stand..

"...O stand, stand at the window

As the tears scald and start;

You shall love your crooked neighbour

With your crooked heart..."

 - by W.H.Auden  (via 22 words) -

Though he die...

photo via undocumented-change

If cracks in stone walls make way for clambering twigs which carry blossom on their finger-tips, then maybe cracks aren't such a bad thing. If out of brokeness, something beautiful can be seen.... which joins together two crumbling things. To be sure, the message of death and decay can't be escaped; it's engraved into the core of all earthly things.. but the message of resurrection is written just as clear. That wall is dying, breaking down, yes.... and given much longer, life itself will fully destroy it .... but does that matter, if a blossoming tree is growing there, ready to take it's place. One thing dies. Another thing lives. It's as simple as that. As heart-breakingly harsh as that. As wonderful as that. Each winter tree and subsequent spring leaf bears testimony to this. Out of one thing's death, something new can live. And the glorious message proclaimed at the end of it all, is this: that LOVE is as strong as death. Decay, destruction, brokeness, death... they seem pretty final, yes. But in the midst of this all, something more beautiful springs up. Something stronger, with enough power to resurrect even the dead:........ Love. 

"for love is strong as death..." Song of Songs 8:6

"Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live." 

John 11:25

Unless the Lord...

"Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labour in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. It is vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil, for He gives to His beloved in sleep." - Psalm 127:1-2

"So don't eat the bread of anxious toil, because no matter how hard you work to achieve anything, God has lifted off your back the final responsibility for its success, and God can accomplish more good for those who trust him while they sleep than they can accomplish with anxious labor while awake." - John Piper  (quoted from this article)

Without Words

Photos by Nich Hance

- take me into you -

- nowhere else will do -

(Photo by Nikolinelr)

A torn-up jumper, a torn-up heart....

She walked. She stopped. She walked. She stopped. She walked. She stopped. Each time she walked, it was just one step, then she stopped. Such a steady, yet painful rhythm. It was evident how much each breath hurt. The air skimmed through her lips, like it was cutting her insides with blades. Her face grimaced with the strain. I didn't know what was wrong. But i knew something was. What do you do at times like that? I wanted to wrap my arms round her, to kiss her gently on the cheek, just so she would know, she wasn't alone. But you can't do that to a stranger; to an old lady, who limps under the weight of her own body. And this was when it hit me.... what if she doesn't believe in Jesus? She was distinctly an outcast.... she wore the marks of rejection, hopelessness and despair - they were as clear as the bright pink hat and torn-up jumper she was clothed in.... they were written in her eyes and engraved in the lines on her face. But what if she knew no Saviour? If she walks this Earth in pain then somehow that's just about bareable, if you know that in eternity she will be redeemed. But what if she's not? What if, she not only suffers now, but will suffer then too?.... Such a thought is too much for me. Such a thought reduces me to tears. Such a thought is heartbreaking. 

Sometimes i want to console myself, that everything will one day turn out ok.... in some ways, i know it will...... but, for those who don't believe, it won't be ok. How do you reconcile yourself with that thought? Quite simply, i don't think you do. It says it grieved God to the heart when he had to send the flood.... It grieved Him deeply... so i presume such a thought should grieve us deeply too. But then again, which of us doesn't deserve destruction?... the fact that God chooses to save any is a demonstration of extreme mercy.... though this doesn't lessen the grief of accepting that some won't be saved, it does mean that God does nothing wrong here. So although i can't console myself that life will turn out as i wish, i will console myself with this: "Shall not the God of all the earth do what is just?" (Genesis 18:25)  and this: "But You, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness." (Psalm 86:15) and this: He "does ALL things well" (Mark 7:37). 

We are called to love others, to serve them, to make disciples of all nations and proclaim the truth of who God is... but when it comes to who is actually saved, i guess we simply have to trust a just God. So, though this world is a torn-up, broken mess, i will rest in this.

The wonder of all wonders

"That is the wonder of all wonders, that God loves the lowly.... God is not ashamed of the lowliness of human beings. God marches right in. He chooses people as his instruments and performs his wonders where one would least expect them. God is near to lowliness; he loves the lost, the neglected, the unseemly, the excluded, the weak and the broken. Where human beings say, "Lost," God says, "Found"; where people say, "Condemned," God says, "Saved"; where people say, "No!" God says, "Yes!" - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

I know i often include quotes like this one, but i can't help it, the fact that our God is like this never ceases to make my heart rejoice.

The Lamb of God

"The King of Glory, with His crown of thorns, lips that don't condemn, but cry 'Father forgive'. The nail kissed hands, Holy blood outpoured, Saviour broken, for my healing. Behold the Lamb of God. Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the World. Behold the Lamb of God. Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the World. Oh our Saviour broken, broken for our healing. King of Glory. You are the King of Glory. You are the Lamb of God. Yes You are the Lamb of God. You were pierced for our transgressions, You were wounded for our sins, and the punishment's on You, oh it's bringing us peace, all Your loneliness and shame, and Your wounds oh God, they are bringing us peace - as we receive Your love. Oh the Lamb of God. Thank You Lord. Thank You Jesus. Thank You for Your healing love. You pour out Your healing love on the wounded and the broken. Thank You for Your healing love. Thank You for Your tender mercies. You are making us whole, with Your broken body." 

Song Lyrics by David Edwards

Escape & Endurance

"Sometimes God works miracles of rescue through suffering (Hebrews 11.27-35) and sometimes He gives the faith to endure misery and death (Hebrews 11.35-39). The common denominator in the faith that escapes and the faith that endures, is that in both God is treasured above liberty and life. The one who escapes says, "Jesus is better than what i gain." The one who dies says "Jesus is better than what i lose." That is the essence of faith: Jesus trusted and valued above all." - John Piper

Painted hands and doodled birds...

I got bored, so doodled birds onto a photo of my painted hands. Why? I have no idea.... and clearly i still have a very very long way to go to improve my drawing skills, especially drawing on a computer, which isn't that easy! ha. I kinda had fun though! 

Sunlight

Can you catch sunlight in your hands, wrap it up and hold it there, so it doesn't run away as the night draws in? There was such beautiful light here earlier... i wanted to do just that.... and to fill glass jars with it, then open the lids and watch each ray dance free.... to breathe it in and breathe it out.... to dip my fingers in and paint laughter lines on nighttime's face. It's a shame that's not possible, but i reckon you can catch it in your heart. It feels like a few rays found their way in and decided to stay. 

Victorious

"All hail the Lamb, enthroned on high, His praise shall be our battle cry; He reigns victorious, forever glorious, His name is Jesus, He is the Lord."

- Lyrics by Dave Bilbrough -

To a truer, better beat...

She was fighting and drowning at the very same time. Silently screaming. Helplessly collapsing. Only to her, it felt like she was being engulfed, like an army of impulses were marching through her veins. Like a puppet, who couldn't control it's own strings. Senses merging into one; then dividing into a thousand new ones. Echoing through the vast emptiness of her crowded mind. A state of paradoxes. Nonsensical to you, the reader. But to her, simple reality. Music grew roots, latched itself round her frame, dragging her down. Tiredness stole her strength, forcing her to the ground. Standing still was an earthquake, making her limbs tremble rhythmically. Words would jam her mind, unable to escape her mouth, except for momentary eruptions like a volcano spewing fire. It made her feel drunk, like she was under a spell, though no drink or potion touched her lips. It was just a thunderstorm raging through her brain; leaving a trail of broken residue, a lingering fog, countless aches and pains. This is why, when the storms subsided and seemed a part of yesterday, no longer crossing the boundary of today, she wanted to rejoice. She wanted to take those same muscles and make them move with thanksgiving to a truer, better beat; to raise her voice, and let dancing flow through her feet. 

Kite

Photo by hristina

This picture makes me want to go and fly a kite! I haven't flown a kite for years, i'm sure it was quite a fun thing to do. 

love light

Photo by Philippe N.

I'm all out of words these days, so seem to just be posting pictures and quotes. Ah well, despite my changeable attitude towards photography i could easily spend hours just looking at pictures.. i also really want to make a stop motion at some point.. i have a few ideas for one.. though i've never made one before..

A strong and perfect plea

"Before the throne of God above, 

i have a strong and perfect plea, 

A great high Priest whose Name is Love,

Who ever lives and pleads for me.

My name is graven on His hands,

My name is written on His heart.

I know that while in heaven He stands

No tongue can bid me thence depart.

When satan tempts me to despair

And tells me of the guilt within,

Upward i look and see Him there

Who made an end to all my sin.

Because the sinless Saviour died

My sinful soul is counted free,

For God, the Just, is satisfied

To look on Him and pardon me.

Behold Him there, the risen Lamb,

My perfect, spotless righteousness, 

The great unchangeable I AM,

The King of glory and of grace.

One with Himself, i cannot die,

My soul is purchased by His blood.

My life is hid with Christ on high,

With Christ, my Saviour and my God!"

Lyrics: Charitie Bancroft

He shall

"Cast thy burden upon the Lord and He shall sustain thee. He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved. As for me, i shall call upon the Lord, and the Lord shall save me. Evening and morning and at noon will i pray and cry aloud, and He shall hear my voice." Psalm 55:22, 16-17

Nomadic Man

Photo by Emmanuel Smague

I love his face.